think tank forum

written any?

received any?

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i used to love writing letters, i haven't done any in a while. but usually my style is a more general letter, that at some point focuses on the amazing girl. as for receiving any, not so much. but we'll see. it's hard to find crazy romantic girls like that. at least for me.

Never written any letters, more of just poems and thoughts. Written them because they help me to express and understand myself, but I have never delivered any of them. Never received any either. Most people are too afraid of the others reaction , myself included.

ive got a binder in my car that has probably 30+ pages of poems, thoughts, creative writing type things. nothing clears my head like chillin in zimmerman park, or this bench on the bike trail over looking the river, and writing a few pages of whatever is troubling/worrying me. lots of love stuff. could really care less if the girls read it. actually had one read a few and thought they were awsome. im still think everything i write is crap, hate it when others read.

when i did the poetry thing i couldn't stand people reading it, esp if i was present. there was one exception to this, a good friend in hs who was also going through a lot of the same things as me, usually at the same time. actually we used to head up to the rims and just chill and write, then compare writing. i guess i just didn't like my writing much (this remains true even now) but i kept it because it was mine and it helped (or hurt) me at the time. that said i still have something like 30 pages of writing, just need to get around to getting rid of it.

> nothing clears my head like chillin in zimmerman park, or this bench on the bike trail over looking the river, and writing a few pages of whatever is troubling/worrying me.

:D

> just need to get around to getting rid of it.

huh? or do you mean posting it on ttf? ;o

trashing it.

why?!

that's a terrible way to treat memorabilia.

meh, sometimes its best to move on

props trent, you've got it right

there's a difference between moving on emotionally and moving on with possessions.

i can easily move on emotionally while still retaining immense amounts of memorabilia to trigger some awesome memories.

just because you throw away your shit doesn't mean that you'll move on emotionally. in fact, the fact that you have to throw it away shows that you're really having a hard time emotionally separating yourself form the issue.

Yeah it happens sometimes. When you hold onto something, it feels as if your still hoping for the past to turn into what you want it to. And sometimes ditching stuff gives a feeling of completeness. Almost like when someone dies you go to their funeral to bury them and say your last goodbyes. Of course what happened will never go away, but it helps to give closure. Im not trying to speak for anyone, but that's just how I feel.

if i throw stuff away out of spite or resentment, then i'm just avoiding something

but if i learn to accept it, then i can keep it and have a great memory

i'm tossing it because i don't really like it. only one topic has really stuck with me.

Trent>>Almost like when someone dies you go to their funeral to bury them and say your last goodbyes. Of course what happened will never go away, but it helps to give closure.

If I try and bury something and walk away I feel that I am cheating myself of my full emotional reaction. I don't want closure, I want understanding. Besides, I don't want closure. I want my loves and my losses to always be close (but not a burden). Sometimes I write for my long dead grandmother.

I would hate to think that at the end of a relationship either romantically or my death that someone would tear up everything I gave them or that they gave me.

lucas>>it's hard to find crazy romantic girls like that. at least for me.

Word. I once met a german girl who corresponded with me for several years by hand written letters. But as far as my loves, I have never been with a girl who wrote me a love letter, much to my disappointment.

trent>>Never written any letters, more of just poems and thoughts.

I don't distinguish between poems, thoughts, and what we call love letters. I have never written a cliched letter of strict and unconditional praise but rather letters of rationality, passion, and at times obsession to nearly every girl that I have been involved with romantically.

trent>>Written them because they help me to express and understand myself, but I have never delivered any of them.

I always give my letters by hand or mail. It is all important to me that they are received and read even if (as happens most times) I am never privy to the full and honest reaction of the recipient.

Yes I write for my understanding, but I also write for her understanding of me (which is something I believe that is circumstance based. I mean, you have to get lucky to find the right moments of connection especially when getting to know someone in a new way for the first time).

sounds like a few of you need to learn to man up to your past and tell it to leave without the help from the real world. Just because you have thrown away the ring, letter, picture, etc. does NOT mean you have disconnected yourself from the issue forever.

If your event memory is bad enough to lose after a while, too bad for you not having anything in life to learn from. I promise your emotions still remember things past, especially if you haven't really moved on.

Sounds like Freud would have a hayday hypnotizing you and analyzing all of your emotional instability from past events that you never came to terms with and simply pushed back in your mind.

*sigh*

I wrote a crazy love letter to this chick when I realized she was pregnant.

It was pretty insane. When I write a love letter, it's not about poems, prose, or anything like that. It's about raw emotion. Passion and what not. When I sent a letter, some major event must have happened to make me write it. So I get it all out, and then I send it before I even get a chance to regret it. If they choose not to talk to me again, then they weren't worth it. I'll start scanning some stuff for you guys.

i like that attitude :)

received*!

E, what an indictment of the world... perhaps we put too much weight in physical letters, i have received some beautiful emails...

> i have received some beautiful emails...

I'm glad :-) and to be fair, I've also had no shortage of those. But in this case I am specifically referring to physical letters, because the name of the thread is not "love e-mails" :-P

For me, the extra time (and money) involved with hand-written messages adds just that much more meaning.

i was in a long distance relationship until february (~2 years)- we sent lots of love letters.

also a few hand-delivered ones (through the mail slot in the night...)

i've never recieved a love letter :/

me either :(

I exchanged some when I was like 15 years old. since then, nope.

My ex sent me a bunch while we were together; she moved to England and I dumped her because I'm an asshole.

hahaha

Love letters..mm..no. But I love reading/getting letters. Used to ask my gf to write me letters (many guys who hang out at #bsd know that she lives miles away from me and we see each other once in 6 months or so). She used to write me long letters (5 or 6 pages) before she got a job. She was living with her parents then. Now that she has a job, she hardly gets any time to write letters. I miss those letters. I miss her. :( Am gonna call her.

did you write her back? :)

I didn't. I have crappy handwriting when using my mother tongue. Also, am not that good at writing.

wrote 4 last weekend :-)

I wrote eight last month, but perhaps that is stretching the definition of 'love letters'. At least four count.

Response from primary recipient: coldness and distance. Response from a secondary recipient: positive and sweet.

Effectiveness of love letters comes into question. If one's love is not valued by the one it is given to, does it lose its value?

> If one's love is not valued by the one it is given to, does it loose its value?

If that's the case, it's called "stalking".

Étrangère: Will you write me a love letter?

Also, I'm working on a book of poems for one of my friends. It's mostly raps and stuff, but there are a lot of sentimental things I write about that one chick I'm like in love with. Did you guys want to see some of that?

phi >> If that's the case, it's called "stalking".

:P I consider myself immune from the stalking concern, I was out of the country last month.

Gatz, sure if you want to share. why not?

fs> If one's love is not valued by the one it is given to, does it loose [sic] its value?

of course not!

> Étrangère: Will you write me a love letter?

Sorry, honey, but I think it'd be missing that little something extra.

> I'm working on a book of poems ... Did you guys want to see some of that?

Yeah!

receiving love letters is burdensome.

because the love isn't reciprocated?

yes, that seems to be a common theme of most of the letters i've sent or received

Ditto, but I did end up writing this line for a friend who wanted to talk to an attractive girl on the bus... this is verbatim: "Cano tuam formam ut in meum animadvertas ... lol."